I used to wish there had been no blue dress 

and no semen on it 

and that it had all been a big crazy whopper of a lie 

made up by a very confused and needy 22 year-old 

in order to get a little attention. 

As a woman who has suffered due to rape culture

as a woman who has held others who have suffered due to rape culture

the blue dress 

and its very real semen stain 

are a problem for me. 

Yes, chronologically she was over the age of consent

but

there was never

except perhaps in the cases between way too many priests and way too many young boys

a wider gap in equality authority responsibility or power. 

She was a very young unpaid employee taken advantage of by arguably the most powerful man on the planet. 

Furthermore his wife in effect condoned his behavior

making herself complicit in the perpetuation of rape culture 

by not leaving him.

If she had left him and still won the nomination 

I'd consider the glass ceiling broken. 

She did not leave him though. 

She might be on the other side of the ceiling now

but she didn't break it. 

She got there in part by blaming his victim 

rather than holding him accountable for his heinous abuse of power. 

To look at it any other way is to

look away

to ignore the cries for help

to prove our indifference 

to the pain of our sisters

to the pain of our daughters

I can not

I will not vote for a woman who is complicit in the perpetuation of rape culture.